Blogginess from Western Wednesday

Dear Zach,
(It still sounds stupid to me,)
I feel Left Behind. I'm in love with you, and despite everything I want to be with you so badly, but I don't know what to do, because you seem to be indifferent of me, now, -even pitying. Whereas I love you. I love you Zach and you used to love me back and now I've been dropped again and I know you don't want to pick me back up. I could just cry, though I'm out of tears.
By the way -just for documentation's sake- this morning, after a terrible night in which I only slept three hours at CJ's because I kept picturing and hearing all the horrible possibilities of our breakup -including that you had cheated on me- I spoke with you in private. You made me feel better, Zach, but I still can't really tell how you feel about me because you're never specific and I can't always believe you, now that you've lied so much. But I know that truly you just don't want to date anymore. -I'm scared, Zach, and I know you'd just pity me, but not love me, for it.
Bye for now, I guess.